It's a killer. Killer of the soul and mind.
I feel it.
I can feel it in my body when I try to sleep tonight.
I close my eyes and my mind is racing and my body is tense and ridged.
I could have done more
I could have stopped to ask, hey you ok?
I could have reached out and not laughed and joked.
I could have done more.
Left me with - what if's and why's?
Left me with - I failed as a human being to another.
Left me with - I should have done more.
I need to rid myself of this
It wasn't my 'place'
It wasn't my 'bag'
I try to free myself of it but it comes back in waves of 'what if's?' and 'I should have'
This isn't a new pain, I've felt it before.
It's a man made feeling and product
I've brought it upon myself
I've given it to myself
It's a killer. Killer of the soul and mind